Biggest Loser

Yesterday was the first day in a new challenge I am in. I am very excited about it because I love challenges I feel they help me stay motivated. This week is the water challenge I feel I can do well at this because I love water and drink lots anyway.

On the darker side of things I am feeling nervous about my weigh in this week. We had Thanksgiving dinner a week late at my in-laws on Saturday. I served myself very little portions thinking if I am still hungry after I eat I will go back for another piece of turkey. before I could sit down to eat the baby started fussing so I got up and spent 10 minutes rocking him to sleep. After he was sleeping I ate my dinner and thought I will have some more turkey but unfortunately everybody else helped them selves to seconds before I could get there. So I went home hungry and against my better judgement asked Evan to stop off and get my chips on the way home. I ate 3/4 of the bag all by myself and was still not satisfied so i sent Evan out to McDonald's and when all was said and done i ate about 5 times my points for the day.

Scrapbook

I found an old weight loss scrapbook I had been working on a few years ago. It was pretty depressing to see how well I had done just to throw it all away and gain back plus 20 more. I removed the pages and stored them away and decided to start again (even though I am already 3 months and 30 lbs into it). Hopefully I can keep up with adding to it and it does not end up in the graveyard of unfinished scrapbooks along with my wedding one and my first son's one.

I had my weigh in yesterday and am ashamed at the fact I was upset by the number. I lost 2.2 lbs which is an awesome number especially since it was after a holiday. But I had the number 3.4 stuck in my head because that is what I needed to lose to reach 30 pounds off. Anyway the baby is crying so I'm off to do my mommy thing.

Celebrate

Well I have a few milestones I am able to celebrate this week. Might as well jump right into it. Yesterday I lost 2 lbs and reached my WW 10% got yet another key chain to add to my collection from previous failed WW attempts. But this will be my last key chain I don't have an option to lose my footing and fall backwards again. This 2 lb loss also put me into the 230's a place where I am excited to be and I am at 239 the same weight I was when I got pregnant with my first son. So that means I have taken off every single pound I gained in either of my pregnancies.

I am losing slowly this time and I am fine with it. I have done the race to take off the weight before and always found myself weighing more at the end of those journeys then when I started. So a 1 -2lb loss a week is fine by me. I do have a goal to get below 200 by my 30th birthday which is in May but if I don't meet that its o.k. I guess my real goal is to still be on program and losing by my 30th birthday.

Get that F@#king thing out of here!!!!

That was my thoughts when I weighed myself this morning and did not like what I saw. First I stepped on 246 "grrr that can't be right" step off and back on 237 "nice but I better double check" step off and back on 242 "WTF" The scale has to go! Its not the binge eating or the lack of exercise that makes me fall off the wagon, its the scale. I obsessively weigh myself everyday sometimes more then once a day. I get easily discouraged by the numbers which leads into a more lax-ed attitude towards eating healthy. So after working the WW program like a rock star I weighed myself this morning and was pissed off with what I saw so I told my husband to take the scale and hide it. For the month of October I am committing myself to only getting weighed in at my WW. meeting

10 reasons why I need to lose weight

1. I need to get healthy for myself

2. I need to get healthy for my boys

3. I don't want people to tell me I have a pretty face anymore. Just tell me I'm pretty

4. I don't want to walk into rooms anymore and scan them to see if I am the fattest person in it.

5. I don't want to reach mid-life and still be fat

6. I don't want diabetes, heart disease or any other weight related issues

7. I don't want to hide from people I used to know because I don't want them to see how fat I got

8. I want to be a role model for my boys

9. I want to pass on healthy living to my boys

10. I want to buy cute clothes in regular stores